Included in the old law was a commandment not to commit adultery (Exodus 20:14, one of the Ten Commandments). That law, of course, still stands. But the higher law is for individuals never even to lust after another. If they do, they have already committed adultery in their hearts. We must not allow the lustful feelings that could lead to adultery to get started, and we will never have to worry about that great sin. As Alma encouraged his son, “Bridle all your passions, that ye may be filled with love” (Alma 38:12; see also commentary at Alma 38:12). If we are filled with genuine love, there is no room for lust. If we control the first tempting urges to accommodate physical desires, then we will not follow through and succumb to the serious sexual sin. The Savior reiterated the same commandment in our day, with added warnings of consequences for violating it:
“Verily I say unto you, as I have said before, he that looketh on a woman to lust after her, or if any shall commit adultery in their hearts, they shall not have the Spirit, but shall deny the faith and shall fear” (D&C 63:16).
Larry E. Dahl, a professor in Religious Education at Brigham Young University, wrote: “In the scriptures, the heart has to do with the core or essence of a person—his real intent and unfeigned desires. (See Prov. 23:7.) If one would in fact commit adultery with the object of his lust if the opportunity were present, he is an adulterous person. Although taught in terms of a man lusting after a woman, the principle applies to all, male and female.
“But what if one really wouldn’t commit the act of adultery, yet suffers real temptation? In a world saturated with immoral aural and visual stimuli, such thoughts and temptations can be daily fare.
“Although we cannot avoid all the stimuli, we can plead with the Lord to help us control and channel our thoughts. We can consciously avoid compromising situations and forthrightly resist temptation. Rather than allowing improper thoughts to linger—and enhancing and savoring them—we can dismiss them with a prayer or an uplifting hymn or song, and deliberately channel our thoughts into positive paths.
“If we imagine ourselves involved in improper things, our thoughts may influence our heart’s inclination and perhaps even our future behavior. Dr. Maxwell Maltz underscores the connection between our thoughts and our body’s nervous system: ‘Experimental and clinical psychologists have proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that the human nervous system cannot tell the difference between an “actual” experience and an experience imagined vividly and in detail.’”40
The Lord commands us to not allow the lusts of the flesh to enter into our heart. Though our physical bodies normally contain strong sexual desires—which are good, wholesome, and proper when used at the right time and under the right conditions for divinely approved purposes—it is better to deny ourselves any improper, lustful desires. That is, in a figurative sense, a way of “taking up our cross,” denying ourselves certain forbidden pleasures to avoid being cast into hell and losing the opportunity to enjoy those sacred sexual powers forever. Moroni wrote: “Touch not the evil gift, nor the unclean thing… . Come unto Christ … and deny yourselves of all ungodliness” (Moroni 10:30, 32; see also Matthew 16:24, footnote d, from JST, Matthew 16:26).
President Spencer W. Kimball taught: “Many acknowledge the vice of physical adultery, but still rationalize that anything short of that heinous sin may not be condemned too harshly; however, the Lord has said many times: ‘Ye have heard that it was said by them of old times, Thou shalt not commit adultery:
“‘But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.’ (Matt. 5:27–28.)
“And to paraphrase and give the modern version: ‘And she that looketh upon a man to lust after him shall deny the faith, and shall not have the Spirit; and if she repents not she shall be cast out [or excommunicated].’ (See D&C 42:23.) The commands of the Lord apply to women with equal force as to their husbands, and those scriptures come with the same sharpness and exactness to both sexes, for he has but a single standard of morality. It is not always the man who is the aggressor. Often it is the pursuing, coveting woman, and note that for both, all is lost if there is not true, sustained, and real repentance.
“Home-breaking is sin, and any thought, act, or association which will tend to destroy another’s home is a grievous transgression.”41